Dear Uncle Nigel,
Where are the bloody results of the 2017 Admiral’s Cup !! ?
We are nearly 2 weeks after the event and me and my wife and at least one other person down at the pub have been awaiting, with baited breath, the results of this prestigious tournament.
My wife says that Hoppy Dearsley, the international fixtures secretary, is in a right strop because he played golf like “Indy Trees” the famous Icelandic golfer who was rubbish and he was not even as good as “Wangit Downda Middle” the North Korean champion famous for his 198 over par round of 2011.
Demetri, my Russian friend from the pub, points out that Hoppy has been in France desperately trying to test his liver to breaking point with red wine and pate de fois gras, whatever that is !
Personally I think that Hoppy is concerned that a Speeding Ticket is on its way to his door after he rushed Nigel Carby from his dentist chair to the first tee on the fateful opening day of the tournament.
Either way we should be told !!
Yours Vlad Putin, Full address supplied.
Fuck Off You Twat !
Ps: Fuck Off You Twat !