Ask Maurice ! His Knowledge is Divine !
Introducing the new Golf OK life style councillor and global golfing consultant Maurice (Mo to his friends) Hameed.
With over 50 years of golfing experience behind him and a life time of religious and philosophical training Mo has the perfect qualifications to take on the Golf Ok Golfing and Lifestyle Guru role.
Born in Northern Ireland the illegitimate love child of a Catholic Priest and a Persian Princess Mo had a tragic start in life. Both his parents were killed in an outrageous Loyalist bombing plot. Apparently the loyalist paramilitaries mistakenly blew up the only synagogue in Belfast, which they were convinced was a secret IRA meeting place, whilst Mo’s Mother and Father were seeking refuge in the building from their respective and outraged families.
The families were in a state of shock having found out about the clandestine relationship and love child.
Maurice’s parents, Princess Mahula , daughter of the Persian (now Iranian) ambassador to Eire and Father Hameed, senior assistant to the Archbishop of Armagh, Primate of All Ireland, had been told of the relationship and the love child by an Loyalist informer.
Sadly the message as to their whereabouts became misconstrued in translation and “The Catholic boy is having it off with a Persian in the Synagogue” became “The Catholics have a Pershing in the Synagogue!”
“Pershing” being a type of US manufactured missile.
So the UDF took their chance.
Luckily for Maurice he was being looked after by a group of Islamic Iranian exiles in the only Mosque in Belfast and he survived the attack.
Over the next 16 years Mo was swapped back and forth between the Iranian and Irish families who were his kin. He was educated in both Catholic and Muslim faiths and as he is often quoted in saying: “I didn’t know what the fook was going on !”.
At 16 years of age Mo awaken to the fact the he had a special calling.
As he thought at the time:
“I’m being called from all over the fooking place!”.
He left Ireland with one goal, “I must sort out which fooking God I believe in cos’ its fooking confusing!”
Mo then travelled the world for the next 40 years and has studied and become ordained in Every religion and organised faith on the planet.
When asked if this did not cause him some clash of conscience having taken vows of obedience, vows of faith and ordinance in very serious belief systems and religious teachings he comments:
“No problem sunbeam, I always kept me fooking fingers crossed!”
So here he is.
Obviously Mo will be answering the OK Golf community’s questions on life, the universe and the backswing from a place of hiding but be assured he is on the case.
Gentlemen – Maurice Hameed awaits your call !
