Dear Uncle Nigel,
I was shocked to read the summary of last weeks’ Tuesday golf. Your reporter, nay Hack, referred to my continuation of summer “form”. I must protest in the strongest possible manner regarding the use of the word form. As any twopenny-halfpenny reporter with any self respect will know, form is temporary, it is “class” that is permanent.
You will be receiving a stern protestation from my barrister, accompanied by a law suit, for this libellous, scurrilous behaviour.
The right honourable,
Lord Chilly of Ouzalem. By e-mail
Fuck Off you Twat !
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