Dear Uncle Nigel,
I have recently read that we are all about to be Vaccinated against the nasty Covid 19 virus !
This all sounds very good BUT Fergus from the pub, obviously I have only seen him on Zoom over the past 4 weeks, says that this vaccine is all part of a global conspiracy !
Apparently he has it good authority that Bill Gates, whoever he is, has arranged for us all to be injected with a mirco chip which will change our DNA and make us do what the government wants.
I did point out to him that that is mostly what we do anyway but he is adamant that this is the beginning of the end.
When pressed on what “the end” would mean he became upset and told me to Fuck Off !
Still I see this as an opportunity, if you could have a word with this bloke Gates and arrange for there to be a Play Better Golf chip developed then I would be very happy to go ahead and get jabbed up in the knowledge that I would see an instant improvement in my game.
Do you think this could be arranged ?
Looking forward to a positive response.
With best wishes:
Lord Sugar. by e-mail.
Dear Mr Sugar,
Fuck Off you Twat !
Ps: My word processor has stopped working, its only 40 years old , you Twat !