Good day to you fellow swingers,

I am surprised ( but also pleased for you all) to see that nobody is suffering at present other than myself!

I have been suffering from shit golf recently so I have had to contact someone with even more qualifications and meaningless letters after their name, Prof Brian Oliver Locks who taught me everything he could be bothered too and he told me to loose the shit bit and empty my bowels before I play so I am going too try this this week.

I would like to apologise in advance to my fellow players and greenstaff at Kibworth for my poo on the first tee but the Professor knows what he is talking about and I just want to get better.

Dr Biff.