Dear Uncle Nigel – Stern Protestation !
Dear Uncle Nigel,
I was shocked to read the summary of last weeks’ Tuesday golf. Your reporter, nay Hack, referred to my continuation of summer “form”. I must protest in the strongest possible manner regarding the use of the word form. As any twopenny-halfpenny reporter with any self respect will know, form is temporary, it is “class” that is permanent.
You will be receiving a stern protestation from my barrister, accompanied by a law suit, for this libellous, scurrilous behaviour.
Yours furiously,
The right honourable,
Lord Chilly of Ouzalem. By e-mail
Dear Lord,
Fuck Off you Twat !
We are experiencing huge demand for Nigel’s advice and guidance in these difficult times, why ? we have no idea. So if it takes longer for us to respond to your problem please send cash.
